Love is in the air… oh, never mind, that’s pollen. Achoo! Spring is two weeks away, but you can feel and smell it coming. It was eighty-one freaking degrees today! I have to admit, spring is one of my favorite seasons (fall is the other), but there are some things I just don’t like about spring, ie: pollen, and bugs.
I was thinking about this beautiful time of the year, and how the flowers bloom, the weather is great, and it’s the perfect time to be outside (with bug repellent of course). The beauty of nature and the new beginnings that spring brings, reminds me of how beautiful and fresh things are during the beginning stages of a relationship. Sometimes, things can feel magical.
The early stages of a relationship is great. Everything is going how it’s supposed to. It’s almost like a Disney princess movie. You’re all smiles, your person says and does all the right things, and you’re happy, almost to the point of ecstasy. Come on, I know that you know what I’m talking about. I’ve seen a few of y’all floating on cloud nine too.
What happens though, when your spring is less sunshine, and more cloudy days? What happens when the birds are no longer chirping in the morning, but the “same old song” is keeping you awake at night? What happens when there’s no flowers, but hell of a lot of bumblebees and pollen? What happens when the heat comes, and you’re not ready? What do you do?
Well, my dear friends, you take the good with the bad. Falling in love with the good things about a person or in the beginning stages of a relationship is easy. It’s always going to feel magical or like a dream in the beginning, which is why it’s important to see all sides of a person before deciding to stay in love. We can’t always control the falling in love, but it takes commitment to stay in love, and again, you must see all sides of that person.
I love spring, but I understand everything spring entails, so I prepare myself. That’s the only thing that I can do. I can’t change spring, IT’S SPRING! So, I just make sure I’m stocked with Benadryl, and bug repellent, and I’m good, for the most part- I’m prepared. The same things goes for relationships, and to be honest, not just intimate relationships.
When you love someone, you must fully understand who the person is, and what loving them will mean for you specifically. You may have to be a little more patient than you were in the beginning. You may have to be more compromising, and understanding. There may be some days when you’re like, nope, I can’t do this, and to be honest, love won’t be enough to keep the relationship going. You’re going to have to commit to staying together.
Just like I prepare myself for spring, even before it’s officially spring, it’s important to prepare yourself for the not so great days within your relationship. I’m not saying be cynical or anything like that, I’m just saying we’re imperfect people, and if anything can go wrong, it will, but you must be prepared, by being mature in mind, heart, and spirit, so that you know how to love your person where they are.
Sometimes, the two of you will need space to clear your head and focus on the I in We. Oftentimes, we get lost in We, and it’s important to keep our own identity, and goals in perspective. Sometimes you will have to get out of your feelings and put the stubbornness and pride aside, and remember why you fell in love in the first place.
The relationship won’t always be the sunny side of spring in all it’s glory. Some days it won’t look or feel like spring at all, but if you know that this person is worth a little more patience on your end, or a little more compassion and care, then stock up on these great qualities for that person, because just like we can’t control the weather, we can’t control people. We can only equip ourselves in a way to love them completely, where they are. ❤