Sometimes, it seems like the person who wronged you went on to live this amazing life. They post these great pictures, and seem like they’re living happily ever after, meanwhile, you’re still trying to pick up the pieces from them leaving your life in shambles. Don’t get down, and don’t start to think that maybe you were the problem. People are good at pretending that once you’ve let their toxic behinds go, that now their life is so much sweeter. It’s not, and won’t be until they fix their issues.
Toxic people will hide behind “a great life” to make you and others, believe that they’re living their best life, meanwhile, they’re not happy at all. They find themselves in the same drama they put you through, and sometimes it’s worse, because instead of them dealing with their baggage, they just drag it from person to person, never taking accountability for their wrongs. The thing is, sometimes these toxic individuals are so delusional, that they really believe that their toxic traits aren’t toxic at all, and they make you believe that you are the problem, when all you did was try to love and understand them. Again, don’t get down and don’t feed into this.
Start to pick up the pieces, and most importantly, lean on God, because even the strongest person can’t carry it all- especially when it comes to heartbreak. Don’t worry about how great your ex’s life seems, focus on keeping yours together. When you give yourself the closure you once wanted from them, and begin to heal and focus on you and your goals, them trying to prove to you that their life is so great will become boring to them, because you no longer care.
They no longer have an audience. Many others may be watching, but they were putting on a show for you. When they no longer have your attention, they’ll try to come back. When they don’t acknowledge their toxic traits, and have no accountability for their actions, they don’t come back because they miss you, they just want to see if they have access. It’s more of a game to them, so don’t fall into it.
If they are comfortable with being toxic, and have no accountability for their actions, let them be. Leave the past in the past, because the past doesn’t have anything new to say. Don’t question yourself about leaving the relationship too soon, because nine times out of ten, if you loved that person, you gave them all you had. Sometimes we even give too much, and that’s how we lose ourselves, and are left with picking up the pieces.
So, how to move on from a toxic ex?
• Don’t blame yourself for their wrongs towards you.
• Do take accountability for your actions.
• Find closure yourself, by seeking God and talk about your feelings to a trusted friend or counselor.
• Focus on accomplishing your goals.
• Find a hobby and/or do things that makes you happy.
• Love on yourself (and those who love you) more.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this post. Feel free to like, share, and comment. Also, check out my book, “Betrayed with a kiss,” for more inspiration and tips on how to move forward after dealing with a toxic individual. Click the link below.