Equally yoked in mind.

If you’re depressed, irritated or uneasy with them, then you can do without them! There’s a saying, “I can do bad all by myself.” If a person is already in a bad space before getting into a relationship, they don’t need someone who will bring them down any further! They need someone who will help lift them up! Now hear me on this, I’m not saying it’s up to anyone else (as far as people go) to make us happy or to “fix” us. What I am saying is this, a relationship should consist of two people uplifting each other. There shouldn’t be one doing the uplifting while the other is being idle, tearing that person down, or stepping all over the individual in order to lift themselves up! No! A relationship is a team effort. Now, will there always be happy days, absolutely not. Life will try you. Situations will test you, but the two of you must keep a healthy communication going, and fight together, not apart. Too many hearts are broken and relationships are failing because people want to fight the battles that arise within the relationship by themselves instead of together. It’s important to know yourself before entering into a relationship. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Know what demons you’re battling. Know what makes you happy and what doesn’t, but most importantly, be happy with yourself first! If you’re not happy with yourself, by yourself, then you’ll never be truly happy with anyone else. If you’re not whole by yourself, then a relationship will never make you complete. You must have peace of mind and love who you are first, or you will get with someone and depend on them to give you what you won’t even give yourself! Is that fair? No way! That’s how you lose yourself in other people, and that’s how you get into a relationship with someone who takes away your smile or leaves you confused, walking on egg shells or depressed. You gotta give yourself everything that you require someone else to give you. If you require love, respect and honesty, then love yourself, respect yourself and be honest with yourself first. Great relationships takes preparation. You must be a wife or a husband long before the marriage. Marriage should definitely be the goal, otherwise, what are you doing? No relationship is perfect, but healthy relationships consist of people who love God and love themselves. This is the only way you can be capable of truly loving others. The two people should also communicate often and build as a team. “A house divided amongst itself cannot stand.” (See Matthew 12:25) That not only pertains to spiritual relationships but any relationship. You must be on the same page. You must be equally yoked, again, not just on a spiritual level, but on a mental and emotional one as well. If you are trying to better your mindset, but you become yoked with a crazy person, guess what? You will become crazy. If you are emotionally broken and you get with someone who’s emotionally broken as well, the relationship will be toxic. Two broken people can’t make each other whole. Being with someone who’s just as broken as you are isn’t being equally yoked, that’s just being with someone who has been through a similar experience. That’s not enough to keep a healthy relationship going if the two of you don’t share the same mindset. So, work on getting your mindset and your life where it needs to be, before bringing someone else into it. No one willingly wants to be brought into another person’s chaos, at least no one in their right mind.

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