What a person believes about themselves is so important, because ultimately their life decisions are guided by those thoughts. We are all imperfect, so we have some insecurities about some things in our life, but it is very unhealthy to you physically, emotionally and spiritually to allow those insecurities to dictate your life choices. I know of people who settle for less than they deserve (relationship wise) all because they feel sorry for themselves in some way. These people may have a list of positives going for themselves in life, but because of one or two areas in their life that they’re insecure about, they choose to settle for what they can get, rather than what they deserve. Now hear me out, these aren’t my thoughts that they can only get someone who will use and abuse their love, these are their personal thoughts.
I believe that anyone can receive the love that they deserve, but first, you must love yourself. You can’t expect a person to love you more than you love yourself. When it comes to love and respect, people mimic the way that you treat yourself. Unfortunately the world we live in has many people that would rather prey on your insecurities, than pray for your insecurities. TV and social media are constantly showing us that you have to look a certain way or have a certain status to be important or accepted.
This is very toxic, especially for a person who is struggling with accepting themselves and being accepted by the world. That’s why it’s so important to get into the word of God, so that you can learn to know and believe what God says about you, more than the world. There are people subconsciously making poor decisions about their life, and in reality they believe that they’re being reasonable. They make excuses as to why they settle for less (in love and in life) rather than put in the necessary work to change or learn to love themselves and focus on nourishing the positives in their lives. When you consent to settling for less than you deserve, you are giving people approval to treat you less than you deserve.
So the blame is not one hundred percent on them. You are an adult! More than likely you had a victim mindset long before they made you a victim in some way. I’m not excusing someone’s crappy behavior towards you, but learn to take accountability for your actions. There are situations that happen and it may not have been your fault, don’t allow what happened to you to defeat you!
It can work for your good, if you give it to God! He is the only one that can cause your problems to lead you to your purpose! Let’s change the victim mentality into a victorious and virtuous mindset! Through Christ all things are possible! Let’s accept what we can’t change (you don’t have to approve of it, but have peace) change what we can and focus more on what we have to offer the world, and less on what we do not have.
None of us have it all together! Even if a person is strong in ninety nine areas, they have one area that is weak, but it is up to that person or you, if you’re this person, to focus more on your good, than that one bad thing! Or maybe you feel that ninety nine things are wrong with you, and it’s only one thing right, I challenge you to give that one thing to God, and watch Him do something miraculous and extraordinary with it! Starve the negatives in your mind and in your life, and feed the positives by speaking the Word over your life. You are the head and not the tail (Deuteronomy 28:13).
You were predestined for greatness (Ephesians 1:5-14). By His stripes you are healed (Isaiah 53:5). No weapon formed against you shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). All things are working for your good (Romans 8:28). You are not condemned (Romans 8:1).
Listen, I could go on and on, but my point is, GET INTO THE WORD! Think and speak like you’re connected to Christ, because you are! There is a power at work in you like you cannot imagine, but you have to encourage it! The verity of your consent tells you and the world around you, what you believe about yourself. It tells people how to treat you, and it sets the tone of the energy around you!
So, be more mindful of what you consent to, and more importantly why you’ve given your consent! Walk by faith, not by sight ( 2 Corinthians 5:7).